Little Big Things / Trials and Tribulations

You can’t lead a positive life with a negative mind

negative-postiveI have realized that I can not force others to like me. The truth is, I don’t really care if others like me or not. I like myself. I have struggled for a very long time to accept my body, and my past. I try to be nice to those around me. To take the higher road. Even for those who do not deserve it. Not to say that I am a fake person, I just prefer peace to fighting. I hope that perhaps if I am nice, others will be the same. Unfortunately, there are some people who are unable to be pleasant. No matter how they are approached, it will always be a fight, or a snarky remark, or just hateful behavior. I can usually see this in a person and I tend to just stay away. To live a positive life, one must surround themselves with positive people. My struggle is when the negative behavior comes from those within the family. How do we approach those who no matter what will turn everything into a negative? They make sure that life is a competition (even when it comes to the children). This is my struggle. I try to stay away. Create my own family events separate from these people. I let other family members know that they do not need to defend me when I am not there (although I do appreciate their support) and they never have to choose sides. I have learned to let the negative roll off my shoulders. I ignore the comments. I do not respond and I try to not get sucked into the fighting. Although this is not an easy feat, I am getting better at it each day. I have a small family and it saddens me to know that there are those within it that would rather be mean that be close. It saddens me that my children will not be close to their cousins because of petty adult behavior. But I am also proud. I am proud that I can be a positive example to my children. To let them know that just because someone is mean does not give you the right to be mean back. I try to show them how to overcome negativity and I know that this will make them stronger people. Everyday they are nice and everyday they treat others well is a reflection of the job that I am doing. That is and will always be the best Mothers Day gift I will ever get.

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