Wow, its been a long time since I have been here. Its been a long time since I have wanted to write my thoughts out on the screen. But as long as it has been, its like coming back to an old friend. My old friend who has been waiting patiently knowing that eventually, I would return, and return I have.
So much has happened since I have been here. I have lost loved ones, to old age and addiction. My family is splintered and the effects are taking its toll. New ventures have been started, some chapters are closed, and new ones are just beginning. I have fought many battles, and still there are more to come, yet the war is far from over.
Many days I am strong like a warrior, and some days its a fight to get out of bed. But get up I do as my life is not my own. There are three little beings that depend on me to get up, fight the demons in my head and start the day. They do not need to know how each day is a battle to keep our lives as normal as possible. But these days, what is normal?
All that we once knew is now a distant memory of the past. Old arguments replaced by new, old travels replaced by new adventures. Each day we look to each other as if to say, what do we do next? It is my job to be the captain of this ever changing journey, yet many days I look to my children to lead the way. These little people are wise beyond their years. They have an understanding that I can only hope to attain one day.
Yet with all that is changing, so much stays the same. They still look to me to lead the way. Their little eyes gazing deep into my soul, as if they are reassuring me that although they understand the journey is difficult, they will stand by me through it all. We gain strength from each other and that strength will pull us through these difficult times.